Cat Naps and Celestial Drinks.

My dad says orange juice is the drink of heaven. Its odd- but today all i can say is ditto. I woke up and i was SOOOOO sick and when i say sick- i slept until 1 PM.... WOW haha, and i still have SOME homework, but i'm not so concerned any more, i'm well rested, i need to learn how to video blog, not going to lie that was pretty cool

Romeo leaves in about 10 hours. Wow. Who knew it would come so soon? ... I don't really have a set reaction, my brain puts itself in autopilot- and thats alot easier to live with, the months fly faster, time goes by.... but with that, i sort of lose myself, and honestly? That scares me, this is one of the saddest entries- probably THE saddest... why? I don't like sadness. I've been there, i remember three years of my mom constantly every winter picking me up from school because they thought i was mentally unstable- but more then that, i remember how i felt. i was confused, i was angry, i was constantly upset and i felt like no one could do anything right but me. How messed up is that? And what was worse? i'm one of the cases that was depicted as light. reasonably controlled. YUCK! but i'm alright now, lets not sit aorund the fire and sing Kum-Ba-Yah shall we? All i know is that 'auto-pilot' is good and its bad, it keeps you away from pain... it keeps you away from joy. Its like a blank white paper being called beautiful, its not ugly, but its not a masterpeice. Its weird i know....

nice thing:

Sarah? She's spiritual in a way everyone else is scared of. When a warrior comes back from war- who gets more respect? the person with no scares and a badge of honor, or the guy who got his arm blown off and teased in the barraks? Oddly. Sarah is the one with scares, most of us overlook. She's been in situation that people say oh thats her fault, but whats more important, she comes back and she comes back with wicked scars, stories that are honorable, my sister is a warrior. Like Arwen or Rosalie, she came back instead of going to the better life. She came back to be scorned and bullied, but she chooses not to tell her stories, to me my sister is a hero